it's all about you

by brown cow

Smiling

Hoping

Dreaming

Wishing you were here

The air has grown cold
Not as sunny without you around
Come by
Come by my part of town

Grinning

Yearning

Dreaming

Hoping you’ll be here

The sun has broken away from the clouds
A single ray of golden light stretches distances
My guide toward you
My guide toward truth

Smiling from ear to ear...

You’re here

Not today, maybe tomorrow

by Turtledove

If confidence
can be summed up
to a day
where you take off
all your clothes

and love what you see

I think we're all
shit outta luck

Hypocrite?

by Turtledove

When the girl wearing all black
Tells us she hates punks
I say, "What does that make you?"

FOUND POEM

they call this a found poem. i am not the original author. more a spectator to a greater good.

whitehorse.

i don't know i guess i shouldn't complain

tear into me, i'm not a martyr:

but i can't change the way she feels: i can just try to mend our broken relationship

from back b4 we dated

and from what good grew

trust me there is a lot more to us :

she helped me through a lot:

and i appreciate that

and loved her for that:

and when i couldn't give her the love she gave me

i let her go:

cuz i couldnt' be to her what she was to me

but dammit it doesn't matter how many times i say that or tell anyone that she still is gonna be pissed at me:

and that's fine its her right

FLOOD

by white horse

you told me you like walking along the shoreline
just up to your ankles in water
because it gives you a

sense
of the ocean.

it gives off an overwhelming feeling
that there is soo much more there to be seen
so much that stays
waiting

and i wanted to share with you
my most private thought
but i wasnt sure if you would hear it.


because i have that feeling
each time she enters the room

Envy

by brown cow

Envy is you
Envy is me
Envy is all you are and all I want to be

Cowardly in the face of danger
Powerful as a force in one’s life
Envy is the masked man
Who has come to take you through the night

Envy is the vulture intently watching from above
Envy is the dream you have of what life should be full of
Envy is the quiet master of all the light in life
Envy is a stabbing by a dull knife

Stars glow black
Following the minds twisted path
Toward the light you think you know
The light this envy shows

three different poems

by white horse

i keep pointing out the moon

like a child

telling you that astronauts landed there
years and years ago
and we never went back because i coudlnt make us money

and its strange that the moon has cycles compareable to a woman

and as i sit her considering that i wont pass this up.

"the moon has never been mean to me for no good reason
and then not wanted to fool around"

2.

i wanted a drug dependancy.
i guess thats why i took two vicadin instead of one
it didnt make me hurt less
it just made me feel like it could

placebo

i wanted to be addicted.
i wanted the benefits to outweigh the consequences
by a margin at the horsetracks.

what i really wanted was for you to be home.

3

we could talk about this all night
going back and forth
considering the facts
but it wont get us anywhere.

i will still wake up thinking im right
and a few blocks away you will get up
and think you are gods gift to women

and what if you are?

there is a sweet side to you that i only get to see
when you are holding animals
so whats the point in holding a trial

i was guilty by association

alt F4

standing in front of you i feel like a pop-up add
some shit that is just wasting your time
between last week and the next great idea

as if you could just click at the top of me and i would go away

would you?
perhaps i would be a bit more stubborn then that

but in all probability i wouldnt.

you can scroll through my feelings
do you fucking realize that.

this isnt part of the poem.
this is part of a problem

i am your voice on tape, you are never pleased (it is never what you expected)

Dental Work

by brown cow

The sky was blue
The clouds glowed white
But all I could think of was what happened that night
When the sky and the town turned upside down

The buildings pointed toward the grass
The sky was now the ground and the clouds its oceans
Masses of white filled the night

The streets were dominated by white pillows of gas
This all made me confused
I ran, no darted through the cloudy streets not at all amused

Who had played this trick?
Was it a witch?

Something shone bright
The luminescence filled the night
Suddenly someone turned on the light

“All done!”
I woke up bemused
Then I saw my teeth lying on the table next to me

Keds, a broken glass story

by white horse

its hard to imagine someone you thought you knew

pissing down a slide

or showing her tits to drunk boys.

but not so impossible to see.

there was this one girl who showed us her chest in a park
in broad daylight.

she came walking around the side of the building swinging her bra.

from time to time i would see her in the halls and remember
and girls always say "boobs are the same"
well so are flowers
so is everything worth looking at
but no one ever questions a botonist.

just thinking of all the flower vaginas in my yard could make me sick

part two
and i thougt of the twin boys she was always with.

what if they knew?
what if they didnt?

later that day a twenty year old girl who had seen the whole thing came over

she sat down next to me.

and explained about girls and the proper way to treat them

you know what?
she was right.

My Love

Two different personalities
Both need the same nurishment
That's why we could talk until our mouths turn to dust

I discover you everyday
And learn to love an exotic flavor
That made me wince only days before

The secret to happiness is not in seeking perfection
But in discovering it where you least expected

who knows

by Turtledove
 
Uh... hello?
I believe you left me.
 
Are you crying or something?
 
What if I was?
Would that make you feel horrible?
 
I would tell you to suck it up.
 
That's not very comforting
 
Well I'm not worth crying over.
 
Well I'm crying
 
Well stop.

 

a ring on the beach

by white horse

it was if your words had really cut my face
left scars soo deep my mom could see
and she knew before i told her
she knew before i walked in the door

they call it mothers intuition.

like that night she told me to triple check crossing the street.
and nothing happened

i have often wondered if they were

isolated               incidents

or if they relied on each other.

i gently kissed my mothers forehead
and explained to her
what she had been telling me my whole life

"everything is going to be okay"

 

 

 

we like the same songs

by white horse

in my dream i was killing you

like i always planed to as a kid

those times i would pick up the knife,
the biggest on in the kitchen

and hold it out infront of me
as protection
or validation

and mom told you in quiet rooms
how much i wanted to be like you

and i told myself in quiet rooms
how that would never happen

because to this day i dont know
what i would have done

if you had taken one more step

 

 

you have 100 minutes, good luck

by white horse

 
im a fraid you dont________ me

L.) understand
O.) care for
V.) worry about
E.) trust

Would you say we are soul mates? _________

I.) yes
S.) no

How did we meet?_________

O.) at a party
N.) through friends
E.) at school

Whats my favorite color?________

B.) orange
I.) grey
G.) turqouise

When did we last talk?____________

T.) in my front yard
E.) on the phone
S.) over instant messenger
T.) in your car

 

cradle and all

by Turtledove
 
If we created robot babies
and loved them
 
Maybe we could convice them
not to grow up
and destroy the world
 
But if it turned out that our babies
killed everyone but us
 
Would we repopulate?
 
Or leave the planet
as our babies left it
 
The only ones worth saving

SHE TOLD ME SHE WAS BORED

by whitehorse

he stood with his arms up to the elbow in wash water
scrubbing at particles of food that just didnt want to let go

and i was feeling quite nostalgic

there was a sort of sad irony
rubbing himself out

but maybe im looking too deep

we spoke openly but in whispers
a contradiction by definition our stories almost silent
as to not impose upon our visitors
who use us as tools for thier pleasure
then disregard us as quickly as we hand them change

but not real change, just coins and paper

and we flash our last attempts at smiles
hoping
for a few cents in a cup

i just wanted the rush to calm down so i could talk to him
ask him what happened

and as customers cleared out of our store
he cleared his throat
and spoke

 

 

turtle dove

by whitehorse

he questioned me, again and again

what makes you different?
nothing
what makes you special?
nothing
how can you be in love?
i dont know
how can you feel like that?
i dont know
WHY?
and i was silent

the lack of waves was my weapon

a quiet soo deep that it rushed over us both like water

you should really call her, i explained

but SHE wasnt defined
so he made a choice

THE earth never makes mistakes i suppose

----------------------------------------------------------

TURTLE DOVE ( in questions) (then in a statement)

how much time did she spend putting those stickes on cards?

getting the wording just right, so he would love her?

or singing her hardest for him?

was it for him?

do you really know?

and did you see the way she looked at him?

How was that?

like he was the last boy she would ever need

really?

 

 

 

a sacred trinity

by whitehorse

1.

the moments in your car
between goodbyes
are silent                            (like freezers)

and i can never vocalize it

"dont leave"

your car is already parked, just turn the key
come to my door.

kiss me (with feeling this time) so i dont have to wonder
again
so i dont have to wonder
ever
what you are thinking

2.

i wanted to stay mad
but your laughs settled in my chest

like a cold once my eyes stopped watering
my jaw slowly unclenched

and i stood like a sentinal and stared down my street
with eyes cut like diamonds
but not nearly as sharp

i was trying not to let you get the best of me
but thats what you are

3.

i climbed into my car
and considered turning off the radio

taking this ride in silence

but the sounds of the street
would have found me desperate

for feeling
for her
for her
for her

for touches i could have
if i was solid
like my father
if i could stand tall
than my father
a man
in boys shoes

 

 

lately

by Turtledove
 
I close my eyes and tune him out
Feeling your fingertips on my back
... but only imagining.
 
With every word he's saying
I'm hearing something you said to me once
A joke you've already told
A line you've already used
 
I'm tired of pretending to be
interested in what he's saying.
 
Maybe I shouldn't hang out with guys anymore.
If they always wind up reminding me of you

fifty five

by white horse.

i pressed my face against the window
and let light reflect off of everything

and you wonder what a crash would be like
at this speed

and someone who i wondered if i would ever know
talked openly about his life

and his fear of having children

"this world is just fucked up"

"i know" i agree
but my mind is someplace esle
visiting him years down the road
and never forgetting the moment he said

there has to be a god

 

before you go

by Turtledove
 
A hollowed out canteen
that used to be full
Is better than an empty one
that's never been filled at all
 
With hollow, there's hope.
 
Empty's got nothing to offer but
the mothballs and cobwebs it
drags to every destination.
 
Do me a favor
Take this rusted canteen.
It's forgotten how to feel

your room

by white horse

a whirlwind of childhood memories
that you keep around to stare and see
a life that found you happier
when she was you and you were her
but your old clothes are hanging up for purchase
by any one with tiny hips
who thinks thier life is simply clothing
that covers up what your not exposing
a fragile heart that cant quite grasp

that this isnt the fucking past

and we all mess up we all lose sight
of whats important and what is right
but wrong or not we cant keep silent
when our thoughts are always violent
words we wish we would have said
to all those girls you wish were dead
and all the boys who laughed at me
when i was young and couldnt see
that life is built up of pointless stories
that i tell so people wont ignore me
and you know these feelings never last

because tomorrow they are the past.

 

fools gold

by white horse

i know that you dont get it
things like this they tend to fade
even scars will lose thier color
as the blood just slips away

into the parts of me that need it
like my ego and my brain
never stopping to take notice
that that shit is just the same

i lack bravery and commitment
i just live around these rooms
talking in stupid rhythms
pressing myself next to you

hoping for some understanding
from a bunch of people i cant stand
and when they look me in the face
i know they just dont give a damn

because my dreams are meant for pillows
and my hands are meant for hips
and the world is more then silver
and its living on your lips

things a hug won't fix

by: Turtledove


You don't whimper.
You would never falter, nor bend.
But I heard you
And looked over to find -
A deep, gouging splinter
Through your eyeball.
You didn't panic, didn't even want me to know.
That near-silent cry
A soft muffle
Had drawn me to tend to your retina.
You told me that you would no longer blink the same -
Never see the same.
Casually, you informed me that things would never be
The same.

the start of something

if you are here you have heard about this from one of our local poets,
we want a forum for open poetry if you want in you can contact us.

 

Georgia
by, whitehorse

We all start in the same place
 Dark Black ink upon a page
thin little lines that never change
Created before we had names
 
And history will never find
A life that is exactly like mine
 But I cant escape the strangest doubt
That they are in and I am outside
 
Walking through a windless world
Straining my voice because a girl
Listens to me like im a scholar
Even when im just a fucking liar
 
It’s a reflex you explained to me
That even when our brain cant see
The logic of an engine
We will just keep on pretending
 
I am strong but without muscles
Just a heart that’s built to trust it
Because somethings keep on beating
when I wish I wasn’t breathing
 
In oxygen so thick its fluid
Like these words I never knew meant
I could carry my own baggage
On my shoulder without it sagging
 
Tired of taking my own medicine
It never fails to make me sick
To think that’s how I must have acted
How could you find me attractive
 
Like a wolf trapped in sheeps clothing
Till he doest even know if
He has claws or teeth for biting
 Or Just a flaw that he keeps fighting
 
And you woke up to find me sleeping
Lost in dreams but softly thinking
Our last chance to take some action
Is the point when we lose traction
 
On the tires we thought would carry us
To some place where we couldn’t rush
The things we should take slowly
But all I need is you to hold me right now